We have all felt drained at various times in our lives. Then we start working and that feeling can become worse. And then the kids come. So now, you are working, parenting and trying to have a life. Add in a child who has physical or mental health issues and the stress factor goes up tenfold. Your tank gets drained more quickly and there are days where you feel like you have nothing left to give to anyone or anything, let alone yourself.
Growing up, I bet you never expected your life to be this way. You planned on having the perfect job, the perfect spouse, the perfect children. The perfect life. You really thought you could have it all. Then reality hit. Now you feel like there is nothing left.
Guess what? I’m here to tell you something you may have never heard before:
It is TOTALLY normal to feel that way.
Listen to me: Life is not perfect. In fact, it’s MESSY.
So how can you find energy when you truly feel there is none? It may not be easy, and it will take effort, but you can do it. In fact, you might have to force yourself to keep pushing through.
1. Find Time for Yourself
You need it. You may feel like there is no time to take care of yourself when everyone and everything is pulling at you. While that may be true, if you aren’t able to function because of lack of sleep, lack of self-care, or otherwise, you truly will be no good to anyone – much less those who need you the most.
A few years ago, I knew that I needed to get away for my own mental health. My husband realized it was well. I was fortunate to be able to “escape” for a weekend, truly alone to be on no one’s schedule but mine. I was able to walk around in a different location, sleep in, write, and just be. It definitely helped me to recharge so that I could come back refreshed for my family and job.
Not everyone has the ability to get away for a few days but even 5 minutes of alone time can do wonders for your energy levels.
2. Ask for Help
If you have followed me for any length of time, you know that I am an advocate for asking for what you need. It’s hard and it is still not something that I am good about doing on a regular basis. It doesn’t come naturally to me. However, I have learned that if you don’t ask, you won’t get. Therefore, when I need help and really can’t find a way to do something on my own, I ask for help.
Depending who is in your circle, you may find that asking your spouse, a parent, a friend, or even a coworker for help may relieve some of the pressure or burden you are feeling. Having someone else pick up just one of the balls you are juggling can be enough to give you some space to step back and recharge. The relief felt by not having to do just one thing can make a big difference in your mindset.
3. Take Care of YOUR Mental and Physical Health
We spend so much time worrying about everyone else, that our health, both physical and mental, tends to become the last thing on our list. Unfortunately, this can actually harm us more than we know. If we don’t take care of ourselves, we REALLY won’t be able to help others.
Therefore, it is beyond important that you see your doctors regularly for check ups and any physical issues that you may be having. I learned the hard way that not checking in with your doctor regularly can lead to additional problems. Plus, the lack of energy may actually be your own health issue and could be addressed!
There is still stigma around mental health but not addressing your own mental health can be a problem. Taking care of your mental health does include self-care and time for yourself, but it also includes getting help if you need it. That may mean seeing a therapist, counselor or psychologist but it may also mean reaching out to a coach to help with mindset or other areas in which a coach may be more appropriate for you to reach your goals and to address your needs. Whatever it is that you need to make sure your mental health is where it needs to be, do it.
And, as an extra side effect, you will be showing your family, including your children, the importance of addressing your health. In other words, you will be a good role model for them! Win-Win!
4. Move Your Body!
It may sound counterintuitive. You are so tired that you physically cannot move and I’m suggesting you do just that.
WHY?
Because simply moving has beneficial effects for your brain, attitude, and, yes, your energy levels! I’m not suggesting you run a marathon. Of course not. That would be CRAZY talk, especially if you are not a runner.
- Throw dance party. Grab the kids and put on your favorite playlist and JUST DANCE!
- Go for a walk.
- Pick the weeds in your yard.
Whatever it is, just move. You’ll feel better!
5. Talk to a Friend
Find that friend who you can talk to about anything and nothing. Don’t get into deep conversations. Discuss that binge-worthy show. Talk about your favorite book. Plan a time to get together. Whatever topics take your mind away from your stressors, go there.
Your mind and body will thank you. And I bet your friend will too.